這一波經濟危機始於2007年. 依照經濟循環的歷史,十年之後應該可以回春,而那時,我已經年屆50,弟弟則十二歲.回春不代表興盛,假設經濟達到巔峰需要十年,屆時弟弟則滿二十歲,我則步入老年.我的人生就這樣前半生蹉跎虛耗,沒有成就,後半生辛苦掙扎,看不到未來.心中雖然徬徨,但卻平靜.突然想起,我剛過了不惑之年.
為何說四十而不惑呢? 雖然說這年頭,美國這社會,而立之年提早很多,大概二十歲,年輕人就被父母趕出家門自立了,但我想不惑之年卻是不變的.我不認為美國年輕人能夠三十歲就看透人世,擁有不受影響的價值信念. 四十歲,人生已過半,操持一個家庭也有數年之後,才有可能去思考自己的人生走的如何,接下來該如何結尾.
我的孩子,雖然媽媽能夠陪伴你的時間不長,留給你的遺產不多,但媽媽一直在思考怎麼幫助你具備足夠的競爭力與智慧去完成一個美好的人生. 這世界存在著差異很大的社會,你需要去了解人類的歷史,有關政治經濟如何演化成現在的模樣. 你需要了解科學,幫助你建構更有效率的生活與未來. 你需要了解人性,幫助你看清社會的脈動,建構一個健康的家庭生活. 媽媽能給你的不多,可以給你的是他失敗的經驗,及他所知道的,真實發生過的,成功或失敗的故事.
只要你將來活得滿足快樂,媽媽的一生就無憾了.
1/26/2009
1/14/2009
Why Children Turn Out the Way They do?
One evening my husband came home from work with this book "The Nurture Assumption" in his hand. He told me this is a wonderful book with arguments based on researches which overturn a general concept: a child's personality is shaped or modified by the child's parents. Even though he is a fast reader, I don't think he has gone that far to the paragraphs about how the child's personality is shaped. In parenting he believes in genetics and least effort, yet I believe in education. Here I have to clarify; least effort is not equal to respect and education doesn't mean control. Therefore, I decide to finish this book on the top of the pile of my parenting book collection to find out where I am. Later I will finish more and post them.
First, I am very touched by a poetry quoted from Gibran, because it is exactly my belief in parenthood:
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
-Kahlil Gibran
First, I am very touched by a poetry quoted from Gibran, because it is exactly my belief in parenthood:
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
-Kahlil Gibran
1/13/2009
Life Garden
The church backyard in autumn looks colorful and peaceful. A woman in black is sitting on a wood bench and staring into the distance. She looks sad and lonely as she holds her woolen shawl tightly to the body. She is memorizing the happy old time with her husband and sorrowing the lonely life she lives now. Her husband is leaving her for another woman. She feels tired about the past conflicts and fights. Staying in a peaceful yard and not thinking about solutions makes her feel rested.
When Roger returned for his clothe, Emily was sitting on the window frame. The curtain and her white dress were blowing in the wind. She looked like a statue with such a steady posture. She stayed there and looked at the garden for a couple of days. She always loved this garden. She remembered his admiring eyes surrounding her when she walked in the garden.
He asked her "What are you doing over there? How long have you been sitting there?" She answered him without turning her head "Not long, just thinking." Without further question he walked into the room and started to pack. She knew he was walking out of her life but didn't try to stop him. His passion and tender feeling had shifted to a new lover, and any more action would only disturb him and push him to discard the beautiful memories of their past.
Therefore he left. Emily didn't make any effort to move on. The sorrow and not eating properly struck her down after a few months. When they took her to the hospital, she was very weak and had lost the will to live. Dr. Drake ws surprised at her hollow eyes and her emotionless face in the first moment of seeing her. There was no response when he tried to speak with her. He felt a strong desire to rebuild her. Modern medicine cured her diseases, but didn't help her revive. Dr. Drake hired a lady to take care of her. Each day the lady fed her with nutritious food and prepared a special herb broth to condition her poor health. Gradually Emily's pale face appeared rosy and her hair gained glowing light. When she could sit up in the wheel chair with help, the lady always let her sit in front of window to look outside at the garden during the day. When it was time to leave the hospital, Dr. Drake decided to take Emily home and let the lady continue watching her health.
Emily still didn't speak. It was like she forgot how to speak. In fact she couldn't think either. Everything she saw, through her hollowed eyes were like through an opaque glass, like a dream. She didn't have any feeling with her mind shrinking to a small hole to see this world. However she knew Roger didn't visit her at all, and Dr. Drake and the lady was taking care of her. Emily became more beautiful than ever. When she walked in the garden in her white gown, she looked like goddess in the forest. Dr. Drake was full of tender love for her - he fell in love with his rebuilt work. He didn't know what had happened in Emily's past, but he believed her life must have disappointed her to an unbearable extent. He wasn't sure if Emily would wake up one day or would just keep escape the real world by living in a dream. But he decided to take care of her for the rest of her life.
Roger finally got the news about her sickness, but she was gone when he tried to visit her. He didn't get the chance to talk with Dr. Drake that day, so he thought Emily's family took her to some other place for her recovery. He felt guilty about Emily's misery and that's why he cared about her news. But his life with the new girlfriend was both hectic and so exciting that he rarely thought about Emily. He didn't allow himself to think about the past. Love can fade, and everyone has to move on if that really happens. However, Roger didn't wait too long to meet Emily again.
Note: Thanks for the feedback from Los Altos Community Freelance Writing Workshop - This is so romantic and gentle. We hope we get to read more. I plan to continue from here and come out my first romantic story.
When Roger returned for his clothe, Emily was sitting on the window frame. The curtain and her white dress were blowing in the wind. She looked like a statue with such a steady posture. She stayed there and looked at the garden for a couple of days. She always loved this garden. She remembered his admiring eyes surrounding her when she walked in the garden.
He asked her "What are you doing over there? How long have you been sitting there?" She answered him without turning her head "Not long, just thinking." Without further question he walked into the room and started to pack. She knew he was walking out of her life but didn't try to stop him. His passion and tender feeling had shifted to a new lover, and any more action would only disturb him and push him to discard the beautiful memories of their past.
Therefore he left. Emily didn't make any effort to move on. The sorrow and not eating properly struck her down after a few months. When they took her to the hospital, she was very weak and had lost the will to live. Dr. Drake ws surprised at her hollow eyes and her emotionless face in the first moment of seeing her. There was no response when he tried to speak with her. He felt a strong desire to rebuild her. Modern medicine cured her diseases, but didn't help her revive. Dr. Drake hired a lady to take care of her. Each day the lady fed her with nutritious food and prepared a special herb broth to condition her poor health. Gradually Emily's pale face appeared rosy and her hair gained glowing light. When she could sit up in the wheel chair with help, the lady always let her sit in front of window to look outside at the garden during the day. When it was time to leave the hospital, Dr. Drake decided to take Emily home and let the lady continue watching her health.
Emily still didn't speak. It was like she forgot how to speak. In fact she couldn't think either. Everything she saw, through her hollowed eyes were like through an opaque glass, like a dream. She didn't have any feeling with her mind shrinking to a small hole to see this world. However she knew Roger didn't visit her at all, and Dr. Drake and the lady was taking care of her. Emily became more beautiful than ever. When she walked in the garden in her white gown, she looked like goddess in the forest. Dr. Drake was full of tender love for her - he fell in love with his rebuilt work. He didn't know what had happened in Emily's past, but he believed her life must have disappointed her to an unbearable extent. He wasn't sure if Emily would wake up one day or would just keep escape the real world by living in a dream. But he decided to take care of her for the rest of her life.
Roger finally got the news about her sickness, but she was gone when he tried to visit her. He didn't get the chance to talk with Dr. Drake that day, so he thought Emily's family took her to some other place for her recovery. He felt guilty about Emily's misery and that's why he cared about her news. But his life with the new girlfriend was both hectic and so exciting that he rarely thought about Emily. He didn't allow himself to think about the past. Love can fade, and everyone has to move on if that really happens. However, Roger didn't wait too long to meet Emily again.
Note: Thanks for the feedback from Los Altos Community Freelance Writing Workshop - This is so romantic and gentle. We hope we get to read more. I plan to continue from here and come out my first romantic story.
1/12/2009
Lost Memory
Near the Los Altos library is located a football field, on one side of which grow trees and there are benches for people watch games. It was a breezy and sunny day that parents were watching and cheering for their small children playing football. I stood beside a big tree and noticed that the tree had an exceptionally long trunk extending horizontally to form a platform, then growing to the sky. I suddenly felt an urge to jump on that platform, just like in my childhood....
When I was seven years old, there was a Christian church near our home. Its spacious backyard was a very popular place for the neighborhood kids to play. We played hide and seek, and sometimes we climbed the trees. There was a big and remarkable tree developing branches extensively in all directions. Some of branches could even form a stage where two or three kids could sit. The higher branches were the thicker with leaves. The joy of winning had attracted many kids to try to climb to the top, preferring the slender branch over the safe stage.
One day two groups of brats bumped into each other in the backyard, and started to argue who should own this tree. So all of them decided to send the best guy to run a tree-climbing contest, and the winning side could own the tree for one day. I was sent out to compete with a boy who was about my age. I had such abundant experience in climbing this tree that it was like walking in my own room. With fast moves among the branches, I reached the high place very soon. That boy had followed me, and he decided to make a brave move to win. He jumped from a lower limb on which he stood to a much higher one. When he was finally hanging on the upper limb with both arms struggling hard to hold on, lots of leaves fell from his shaking. We all held our breath to watch him closely, and I also stopped climbing. Finally he stood upon the upper limb, but the tree and the leaves were still shuddering. Suddenly he slipped and fell on the branch. Catching one of the branches, his body brought it down slowly. Every one screamed and hoped the branch could bring him to the ground safely. But it seemed to be too high. When he reached what seemed like 50 feet above the ground, the tree branch suddenly cracked and broke. The boy fell heavily to the ground with the branch in his hands.
Later the church people notified his parents that he had bone fracture. His parents were very shocked and angry. Very soon the church closed the backyard to prevent this kind of accident happening again. All the children were very disappointed about losing the yard and the tree. After a few years we got into high school. and started buy study lives. We stopped talking about it, just like it never existed.
Note : Thanks for comments and corrections from Los Altos Community Freelance Writing Workshop. 2006 Fall.
When I was seven years old, there was a Christian church near our home. Its spacious backyard was a very popular place for the neighborhood kids to play. We played hide and seek, and sometimes we climbed the trees. There was a big and remarkable tree developing branches extensively in all directions. Some of branches could even form a stage where two or three kids could sit. The higher branches were the thicker with leaves. The joy of winning had attracted many kids to try to climb to the top, preferring the slender branch over the safe stage.
One day two groups of brats bumped into each other in the backyard, and started to argue who should own this tree. So all of them decided to send the best guy to run a tree-climbing contest, and the winning side could own the tree for one day. I was sent out to compete with a boy who was about my age. I had such abundant experience in climbing this tree that it was like walking in my own room. With fast moves among the branches, I reached the high place very soon. That boy had followed me, and he decided to make a brave move to win. He jumped from a lower limb on which he stood to a much higher one. When he was finally hanging on the upper limb with both arms struggling hard to hold on, lots of leaves fell from his shaking. We all held our breath to watch him closely, and I also stopped climbing. Finally he stood upon the upper limb, but the tree and the leaves were still shuddering. Suddenly he slipped and fell on the branch. Catching one of the branches, his body brought it down slowly. Every one screamed and hoped the branch could bring him to the ground safely. But it seemed to be too high. When he reached what seemed like 50 feet above the ground, the tree branch suddenly cracked and broke. The boy fell heavily to the ground with the branch in his hands.
Later the church people notified his parents that he had bone fracture. His parents were very shocked and angry. Very soon the church closed the backyard to prevent this kind of accident happening again. All the children were very disappointed about losing the yard and the tree. After a few years we got into high school. and started buy study lives. We stopped talking about it, just like it never existed.
Note : Thanks for comments and corrections from Los Altos Community Freelance Writing Workshop. 2006 Fall.
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